Monday, September 23, 2013

Just Be Decent, Asshat

I can be kind of a loner. I don't mind spending time by myself. I usually enjoy it a whole lot. I don't have to be surrounded by people to be happy. That being said, I still have friends who I talk to, text with, and see as often as my schedule and level of exhaustion will allow. 

I recently interacted with someone who says often that she "doesn't get along with a lot of people."

Oh, hello red flag! How are you?

There is nothing wrong with only having a few friends or not often seeing the friends that you have, if that's the way you want it. You don't have to have a massive social circle to be a happily functioning person, there is a difference between not having a lot of friends or being hesitant to let people get too close, and not "getting along" with people.

If people walk in and out of your life and you can't find a way to be nice and decent to them, then add me to the list of people that you don't get along with. Sure, I meet people who I don't particularly like or click with, but you will almost never find me being anything other than polite unless I'm being a dick to be funny and I know they'll get the joke. I rarely find a situation where being nice doesn't at least make the interaction easier even if the person is a douche canoe.

Having selective taste in friends doesn't mean that every other acquaintance will lead to conflict. 

Or, if it does, you may need to talk to someone about that.

I don't lead a conflict-less existence, but I can get along with most people. I am far from a social butterfly who has been well-skilled in the etiquette of Emily Post and conversational graces. I laugh harder at dick and fart jokes than anything, and sarcasm is my native tongue. 

Even with everything I lack in the social department, life is just easier when I concentrate on not being an asshole.

Unless I'm being a funny asshole. I promise you'll know, though.

Just be nice to people. To every people. To people who you know you'll never be friends with. It will come back to you when you're trying to get to your car with a screaming baby and your arms filled with life and you just need someone to smile at you and remind you that you aren't crazy.

And hold fucking doors. I promise you, it's magical. 

As always, it's hip to be square, kids. 

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

He Wins

So after the last post where I tried to pick a fight with my husband and was being a punk for no real reason...

That same husband showed up at my office midday just to give me a hug because he knew I needed one. 

He wins. 

And, by that token, I win. 

I get it, Universe. I get it.

And thanks. 

As always, it's hip to be square, kids. 

Monday, September 9, 2013

You Don't Get To Be Crazy

Today, I was crazy.

Today, I felt sad about things that I couldn't put my finger on. I was angry at people for no reason. I tried to pick a fight with my husband.

Then I read about a Twitter pal who recently lost a newborn son after losing twins last year. I felt such intense sadness for her. I got mad again, but this time at the universe for being so incredibly unfair to people deserve so much more.

Then I felt like a total shit.

Because no. Just fucking no.

You don't get to wallow in the self-pity of abso-fucking-lutely nothing when there are people who are going through worse and finding an occasional smile. Life is hard sometimes. Sometimes your clothes don't fit. Sometimes your day doesn't go as planned. Sometimes things are shitty.

And you have to fucking get over it.

Because things could be shittier. Life could be harder. You could be grieving or in physical pain.

Obviously, the "you" in this situation is me and no one else, and I'm not talking about biochemical illnesses that are real, treatable diseases and totally out of the control of the sufferer.

I'm talking about me being a bratty, selfish shit who has work to do and a life to live and, well,

...Ain't nobody got time for this.

 Time to put on my big girl panties and remember that there is way more in the universe than my widdle feelings.

Also, I probably need to eat something.

As always, it's hip to be sqaure (and ridiculous), kids.

Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Just This

I'm not ok today.

And that's ok.

It's hip to be square, kids.

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