It Was So Simple

My husband and I fight on weekends. It's over the same topic, and it's incredibly frustrating. The solution to it has been so simple the entire time. For some reason, it never occurred to me. 

My husband is a procrastinator. He is not a planner. He refuses to makes plans for our weekends, and when I try, he never likes them. 

I am a planner. I am a "get it done now" person. When I say something, I want to act on it immediately.  I get things done quickly and usually before they're due. Procrastinating makes me nauseous. 

These differing attitudes cause conflict when I'm hungry and he's lazy.

We usually go out to lunch on weekends. As we begin to get toward the afternoon, I will state that I would like to go eat. He'll say sure, and then not move. Or, he'll go take an hour long shower. Or mow the lawn. Or something else that is not edible. 

Did I mention that I get incredibly grouchy when I'm incredibly hungry?

Oh, yeah.

Anyway, so by the time he is done doing whatever thing he could have been doing hours ago, I'm irritated. And hungry. And the type of grouchy that he knows is coming. And then he gets mad because I'm irritated. And then we argue. And then Saturdays stink until one of us gives in.

Meanwhile, I'm still flipping hungry.

Anyway, today, we slept late and he decided to mow the lawn at noon. Noon is close to lunch time. He is fanatical about the lawn in the way that I am fanatical about being on time. It took him almost two hours to finish and shower. 

Did I mention that I was starving at this point?

Once the shower was over, I assumed he would be dressed and on his way to lunch with me. 

Except that then he lies down on the bed with the iPad and says that he "needs a minute". 

Okay. I get it. You just did a lot of physical labor.

HUNGRY. 

So I did something that I don't think I have ever done before. I didn't get irritated. I just said "screw it" and went downstairs and had a snack. I didn't want to argue, and I didn't want to be hungry anymore. 

WHY WAS THIS SUCH A DIFFICULT SOLUTION TO COME TO? SERIOUSLY, THIS ARGUMENT HAS BEEN GOING ON FOR 3+ YEARS!

Sigh. I'm dense. I get it. 

I also understand that there are starving children in Africa who have it way worse than I do, and I can deal with a few hours of hunger without getting angry. In theory. But baby girl loves to eat.

Anyway, now Hubs is in the bathroom shaving, and that might take another century or two. I'll probably have another snack.

At any rate, it's hip to be square (and not hungry!), kids.


*Edit* He is now taking ANOTHER shower. I WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND BOYS.