Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Sometimes You Have To Stoop To Their Level

I am a huge believer in taking the high road. I don't get down in the emotional mud with people often because it doesn't do anything to help the situation.

I ignore. Ignore. Ignore.

There are a ton of provocative people in my life who offer about a thousand reasons to start a bitch fight. As I get older, I get better at moving past it, biting my tongue and taking deep breaths.

Also, bail is really expensive. I could buy super nice shoes for what bail would cost. 

I really like shoes.

This past week, I broke my oath. I got down in the mud with someone who was ignoring the fact that I have been there for him on a thousand occasions, and he opportunistically created a problem from nothing just to garner attention. 

I'm used to this kind of behavior, but that doesn't mean it doesn't catch me off-guard sometimes. 

If I had to bite down on my tongue any harder, it would have started bleeding.

Stitches are also expensive. And painful.

So I said the things that I was thinking. I said things that I know hurt people. I said them out of anger more than any hope at being productive. I said them because I wanted to be sharp and biting and share some of what they were making me feel. I said them because I wanted to.

And I shouldn't have.

But I'm glad that I did.

It didn't help the situation. It did not get my point across any better. It did not impress upon the drama-creators that I was right and they were wrong. 

It made me feel like I got the flaming ball of hot shit out of my soul for, like, a minute.

Then it reminded me that stooping to their level does not prove the point that I'm right. It makes me just like them. The last thing on this entire planet that I want to be is like them. 

Oh sweet, merciful jee-bus, I do not want to be like them. 

Everyone has a limit. People who push you to that limit just for fun deserve the tongue lashing that comes with it. Be classier than that. That's the real payback. The real payback is watching them ruin the relationships that have been good to them and learning the lesson on their own.

That's the only way people learn. Screaming and yelling doesn't teach people anything. They aren't going to feel remorse for hurting you if they willingly did it in the first place. They'll only feel that if it starts to hurt them. And it will, but you can't make it happen. You just have to wait for it to happen. 

And that is just balls.

I took the low road this one time, and I see why it's called that. It's dirty and grimy down here. You get shit on your shoes. You feel the indigestion of eating 10 greasy orders of cheese fries without antacid. You can't shower enough to get the slime off of you. It's degrading and nullifies like a thousand of the things that I've worked hard for in my life. 

Being down there, though, reminded me that I don't want to be down there. The next time that I want to stoop to that level, I'll remember that it's not worth it. You don't have to let it go, but you have to let it get fixed on it's own. Address it as adults when and if both sides are capable of it. If they aren't, then you have to just wait. 

And wait.

And wait.

'Cause, let's be honest, people suck. 

And they'll only stop sucking when they're ready. 

As always, it's hip to be square (and classy!), kids.

1 comment:

  1. You need to make that rare mistake one in a while to grow. Or that's what I hear at least ;)


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