The best thing that I have gotten out of this whole blogging experience is a network of like-minded and totally sassy lady bloggers who have reinvigorated my hope for the females of our species. Many of them have children, but they also have senses of humor. Their kids are their world, but they still have, like, other ish going on. They have a sense of identity that isn't all wrapped up in the younglings. I know that I have no idea what it is like to be completely responsible for someone else, but I do know that I have watched many a woman lose themselves in the idea that once you are a mother, you are that and only that.
My Twitter friend Amy (@SelfishMom) over at SelfishMom.com wrote a post today that really reminded me how much kids are going to mean to me someday, but also how much I want to remain a woman who is a mother and not a parent who happens to have lady parts and who uses them to add more protoplasm to the human race. Just becuase you have kids doesn't mean that everyone else in the world ceases to exist. In fact, having kids means you should probably shoot for being more considerate because there are tiny sponges who follow you around and watch every damn thing you do. Kids think that adults can do whatever they want. The child mind assumes that if a parents does it, all adults do it. That means that when they're adults, they can be rude, inconscientious, self-centered and a whole host of other not-good things that they could be learning from your (possibly accidental) example. Furthermore, it makes them think that what they are learning about sharing and being nice to other now is just a placeholder for how they get to act once they are "all grown up".
I'm not a mother, but I am a child and adolescent counselor. Kids do what their parents do. What do you want your kids to do?
Read Amy's experience here: DEAR PARENTS: IT’S NOT ALL ABOUT YOUR KID. SINCERELY, THE REST OF THE WORLD
And, as always, it's hip to be square (and kind), kids.